Things You Should Probably Know, Because I Say So

theofficialmrsclaus:

"i’m gonna get a boyfriend this year"

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Maybe next time I won’t replace your batteries when they get low, you snarky little white plastic shit.

holavicente:

How to fuck with anime fans:
Step 1) put a wig on your dog
Step 2)

holavicente:

How to fuck with anime fans:

Step 1) put a wig on your dog

Step 2)

Sometimes, I just can’t.

This guy supposedly just completed his PhD, and is trying to get a job teaching people stuff, in college places, that have to do with history things none the less.

I don’t like to wish people ill, and try to keep my INFJ in check, but genuinely hope no institution hires him, ever, to teach anyone anything. That is the lesser of the two evils with respect to his employment in that line of work.

I am forever reminded of this post.

Booking Gencon, A Narrative in Animated Gifs

Getting tickets for the housing code the night before…

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All ready for the big day tomorrow…

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Trying to get back into my account right at noon…

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Getting logged in, and queuing up on the housing portal…

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Finally into the housing portal. It’s a mad house.

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And trying to figure shit out before my session expires…

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Finding exactly what i want still available.

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And booking it…

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Then the portal kicks me out

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on the last..

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fucking…

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step…

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And I have to get back in the queue…

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Send a text to the boyfriend:

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To see if he’s gotten through while I’m back in the queue…

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He gets in there…

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And what we want is gone, all the hotels less than a mile away are booked…

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And he times out trying to figure out what is still available…

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Then I get back in..

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And book something that is at least decent…

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Then he texts me that he’s found an opening… 

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At our first choice…

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And booked it…

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Anyway…

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Then I inform him that there are cancellation fees…

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That he didn’t read about…

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And I’m like, fuck it.

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We’re booked!

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It’s over!

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And I think about having to do this…

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All over again next year!

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ryanhatesthis:

no stop no

This post requires a 21 gif salute for the full spectrum of feels:

ryanhatesthis:

no stop no

This post requires a 21 gif salute for the full spectrum of feels:

OMG GUIZE! 3 hours to go and we’re only less than 3000$ short of hitting the 9 episode stretch goal! :Fffffffffffff 
SO EXCITING! SO CLOSE!

OMG GUIZE! 3 hours to go and we’re only less than 3000$ short of hitting the 9 episode stretch goal! :Fffffffffffff 

SO EXCITING! SO CLOSE!

natazilla:

princess peach

ugh :[
Madoka flashback triggers

natazilla:

princess peach

ugh :[

Madoka flashback triggers

If I see one more unnecessary br tag today, I’m going to br some stupid person’s stupid fingers!

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I hate Subversion, on all of the days that end in merging back to trunk.

It is giving me all of the feels, except the happy.

soniabunny:

jthurteau:

public static function process($sets, $departmentPeople, $peopleDepartment, $rules)
{ $membersOnlyDepartments = $rules['membersOnlyDepartments']; if (!is_array($membersOnlyDepartments)) { $membersOnlyDepartments = array($membersOnlyDepartments); } $backdoorUsers = $rules['backdoorUser'];...

This, but SQL, and whoa simpler. 

Apparently the same rules that apply to Lolita apply to IT. Very well put.

This is exactly why SQL exists. Except some derp face decided SQL wasn’t good enough for directory information, so they had to go and make LDAP. And another derp decided that the best way to populate contacts into a particular “enterprise” version of an open source chat system is by making someone upload a giant spreadsheet mapping every account, to every contact by contact group. Considering our organizational rules about people with multiple departments getting multiple contact entries per account and people with tin-foil hats in groups that should only be visible to people in that group… it generates over 62,000 rows for 250 or so accounts.

This function happens way after all the LDAP mining has been done (and we have to merge contacts from two different Active Directories using LDAP). 

Instead of one SQL statement with sub-SELECTs and JOINs that would then INSERT/UPDATE this data into the database, this program has to get all contacts, map the right fields (because they are different in each LDAP), normalize data, nestedly loop a billionty times to map relationships between people and their departments. Then it loops a billionty times again to create this crazy spreadsheet matching every person to every other person.

The complicated AND/OR in this function was a real favorite of mine.

You’d think IT people would be forward-thinking enough to give their brethren clear technical requirements.

No.

This extra logic handles the fact that when we have new people to add, we don’t yet know if we are supposed to dump all the old contacts and submit them all, or only submit the new contacts. Assuming the latter we have to decide who to add and generate only rows giving them a contact for everyone else and everyone else a row for them.

It would have been better to filter out people during the LDAP mining part, but since we didn’t know about this possible extra requirement until well after the fact, it turns out to be much “easier” to filter on output :/

On a related note, someone else left our little career starter a few weeks ago, so my group “inherited” another “application” that had been developed outside of IT proper.

Not only did they take SQL and treat it like a spreadsheet, they made it a very bad spreadsheet. I kid you not, it’s like someone decided to make a performance art project out how badly you could misuse SQL.

I am so ready for this three and a half day weekend, you don’t even know!
It’s 2! Time to go!

I am so ready for this three and a half day weekend, you don’t even know!

It’s 2! Time to go!

I think after we finish Will and Grace Brian and I will have to watch Dr. Who. I at least know what these creepy fuckers are all about. 

I think after we finish Will and Grace Brian and I will have to watch Dr. Who. I at least know what these creepy fuckers are all about. 

vizualize:

The Illusion of Choice

Good information to know.

vizualize:

The Illusion of Choice

Good information to know.

bearosuno21:

LMFAO!

I do this all the time. FOREVER IMMEDIATELY REGRET THIS DECISION!